My Dreams of France are over...Good Bye France!

It has been an really emotional week. I have been crying a lot because of my new reality. I will not be going to France for now. I'm heartbroken. So you see, my host family decided to not even contact me anymore and it's 5 weeks before I was going to leave. As for now, I have been trying to figure out what to do now. I still have my job but I'm not sure if I want to continue this whole idea of being an au pair or find an different way of leaving Virginia. My heart doesn't belong here. At least everyone can breathe an side of relieve now that I'm not leaving. Even my roommate told me that she wasn't too excited for me to leave. I'm learning that I shouldn't tell anyone when I'm leaving but two months before next time. At least next year I do have an family that wants me in Lyon, France. As for now, I plan to just work as an Art Teacher. I'm heartbroken but realizing that sometimes it might be worth it to just stay put. I have learned that I need to think more and make sure that it's the right thing to do. I still admire everyone who does this whole Au pair idea. Yes, I did this on my own without an agency but now I think an agency may be easier. At least I'll have the support needed to leave. I'm just hoping that the money I will spend on an agency will be good. I'll have to save up for this. I want to have the best for myself and I guess my au pair dreams will be either dashed forever or just put on hold. I'll just let fate decide. I hope I get to live my dreams someday but for now it's time to survive in the real world without an support system and learning that being alone is hard, hard work. That's my current reality. My dreams of France are over...Good Bye France. Love, Miss NY Girl *tears, tears, tears*